Effective communication is a crucial aspect of a productive and harmonious work environment.
How we express ourselves can significantly impact how others perceive us and how well we work together as a team.
Two common communication styles in the workplace are assertive and aggressive communication.
Understanding the differences between these styles and knowing how to adopt an assertive approach can lead to better professional relationships and increased job satisfaction.
This guide will help you navigate assertive and aggressive communication at work and provide practical tips to develop assertive communication skills.
Understanding Assertive Communication:
Assertive communication is a style of communication that involves expressing one’s needs, thoughts, and feelings in a respectful, direct, and honest manner.
This style is characterized by clear and open communication while considering the rights and feelings of others.
When being assertive at work, you are confident in expressing your viewpoints and opinions without dominating or belittling others.
Benefits of assertive communication:
- Fosters positive relationships and trust among colleagues.
- Encourages open and constructive discussions.
- Increases self-esteem and self-confidence.
- Reduces misunderstandings and conflicts.
- Enhances problem-solving and decision-making processes.
Recognizing Aggressive Communication:
Aggressive communication, on the other hand, is a style where individuals express their needs and opinions in a forceful, hostile, and often disrespectful manner.
Aggressiveness involves attacking others’ ideas, dominating conversations, and disregarding their feelings or perspectives.
This communication style can create a hostile work environment and negatively affect teamwork and employee morale.
Signs of aggressive communication:
- Interrupting or talking over others frequently.
- Using sarcastic or demeaning language.
- Blaming and criticizing others without offering constructive feedback.
- Raising a voice or using threatening gestures.
- Ignoring others’ input or dismissing their opinions.
Tips for Cultivating Assertive Communication Skills:
a. Listen actively: Listen to what others say without interrupting. Practice empathetic listening to fully understand their perspectives.
b. Use “I” statements: When expressing your needs or concerns, use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say, “I feel overwhelmed with the workload” instead of “You always assign too much work.”
c. Be clear and direct: Articulate your thoughts and ideas clearly and concisely, avoiding vague language or beating around the bush.
d. Respect others: Treat your colleagues respectfully and courteously, even when you disagree.
e. Control emotions: Take a deep breath and remain composed, especially in challenging situations. Avoid reacting impulsively to avoid escalating conflicts.
f. Practice assertive body language: Maintain eye contact, use appropriate facial expressions, and adopt an open posture to convey confidence and sincerity. Why not use this test to see how assertive you are?
g. Learn to say no: If your workload is overwhelming, politely decline additional tasks. Offer alternatives or negotiate deadlines if possible.
h. Provide constructive feedback: When offering feedback, focus on specific behaviors or actions and suggest ways to improve without attacking the person.
Dealing with Aggressive Communicators:
a. Stay calm: When faced with aggressive communication, remain composed and avoid reacting emotionally.
b. Set boundaries: Politely inform the aggressive communicator that their behavior is unacceptable and that you expect to be treated respectfully.
c. Address the issue privately: If you feel comfortable, talk to the person privately about their communication style and its impact.
d. Seek support: If the aggression persists or escalates, discuss the matter with your supervisor, HR department, or an appropriate authority figure.
e. Avoid escalating the situation: Responding to aggression with aggression will only worsen the situation. Maintain your assertive communication approach even in challenging circumstances.
Remember that developing assertive communication skills takes time and practice.
Be patient with yourself as you work on improving your communication style.
Creating a culture of assertive communication at work will lead to more effective collaboration, increased job satisfaction, and a healthier work environment.
With 30+ years of training experience, I founded Oak Innovation (oakinnovation.com) in 1995. I help busy training professionals and business managers deliver better training courses in less time by giving them instant access to editable training course material. I received my Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees from University College Cork. I hold qualifications in Professional Development And Training from University College Galway. Clients include Apple, Time Warner, and Harvard University.
