We love an anywhere conflict-style assessment tool that works.
Instructions: The following assessment will help you understand your preferred conflict resolution style.
Read each scenario carefully and select the response that best represents how you typically handle conflicts.
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Choose the option that you believe aligns most closely with your usual behavior.
There are no right or wrong answers, and please answer honestly.
The assessment consists of 15 scenarios.
For each scenario, choose one of the following options:
- Confronting (Competing)
- Accommodating (Yielding)
- Compromising
- Collaborating
- Avoiding
Scenarios:
You and a co-worker have different opinions on how to approach a project. You firmly believe your approach is the most effective.
- I will assert my position and convince my co-worker of its superiority (Confronting).
- I will listen to my co-workers’ ideas and agree to follow their approach to avoid conflict (Accommodating).
- I will seek a middle ground by finding a solution that incorporates both our ideas (Compromising).
- I will suggest working together to create a new, combined approach that benefits from both perspectives (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing the issue and hope it resolves itself (Avoiding).
A friend keeps borrowing money from you and forgetting to pay it back.
- I will tell my friend firmly that I expect them to pay back the money promptly (Confronting).
- I will let my friend borrow money without expecting repayment to maintain the friendship (Accommodating).
- I will agree to forgive part of the debt and have them repay the rest in small instalments (Compromising).
- I will discuss the reasons behind the constant borrowing with my friend and find a solution together (Collaborating).
- I will avoid lending money to my friend in the future and distance myself from the situation (Avoiding).
You are assigned to work on a team project with a difficult team member known for being uncooperative.
- I will take charge and make decisions without involving the problematic team member much (Confronting).
- I will follow the problematic team member’s ideas to keep the peace (Accommodating).
- I will try to find a middle ground and compromise on some aspects of the project (Compromising).
- I will encourage open communication and invite the problematic team member to share their thoughts (Collaborating).
- I will avoid direct interaction with the difficult team member and work independently (Avoiding).
Your partner wants to go to a specific restaurant for dinner, but you have a different place in mind.
- I will insist on going to the preferred restaurant and explain why it’s a better choice (Confronting).
- I will agree to go to their restaurant choice to make them happy (Accommodating).
- I will suggest trying a new restaurant that neither of us has been to before (Compromising).
- I will propose exploring both options and then deciding together (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing the topic and let my partner decide where to go (Avoiding).
There’s a disagreement among family members about how to spend a holiday weekend.
- I will state my preferences clearly and advocate for my idea to be chosen (Confronting).
- I will go along with what most family members want to do (Accommodating).
- I will suggest finding a compromise that allows everyone to do some activities they enjoy (Compromising).
- I will propose planning the weekend together, considering each family member’s preferences (Collaborating).
- I will avoid getting involved in the planning discussions and do something alone (Avoiding).
You and a colleague have different work styles, causing conflicts in how you approach projects.
- I will defend my work style and convince my colleague to adapt (Confronting).
- I will adjust my work style to accommodate my colleague’s preferences (Accommodating).
- I will seek a middle ground and find a way for both work styles to coexist (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating on a project to blend our work styles and leverage each other’s strengths (Collaborating).
- I will avoid working closely with my colleague to minimize potential conflicts (Avoiding).
A team member consistently arrives late for meetings, causing disruptions and delays.
- I will confront the team member privately and express my dissatisfaction with their behavior (Confronting).
- I will let the team member know I understand their challenges and accept the lateness (Accommodating).
- I will suggest finding a compromise, like starting the meetings a bit later, to accommodate their schedule (Compromising).
- I will propose working together to create a plan that encourages punctuality and respects everyone’s time (Collaborating).
- I will avoid addressing the issue directly and hope it improves (Avoiding).
You and your partner disagree about how to handle household chores.
- I will assert my expectations and insist that my partner follows them (Confronting).
- I will let my partner handle the chores in a way they prefer to keep the peace (Accommodating).
- I will suggest dividing the chores based on our preferences and strengths (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating on creating a chore schedule that we agree on (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing the issue further and deal with the chores independently (Avoiding).
Your close friend frequently cancels plans at the last minute.
- I will express my frustration to my friends and ask them to be more considerate of my time (Confronting).
- I will understand my friend’s reasons for cancelling and accept it without complaint (Accommodating).
- I will agree to reschedule plans to a more convenient time for both of us (Compromising).
- I will openly discuss the impact of cancellations with my friend and find a solution together (Collaboratively).
- I will avoid making plans with my friend to avoid disappointment with cancellations (Avoiding).
You and a colleague are both interested in leading a new project at work.
- I will compete with my colleagues to show that I am the better fit for the project (Confronting).
- I will step back and let my colleague lead to avoid conflict (Accommodating).
- I will suggest sharing the project leadership, dividing tasks based on our strengths (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating and co-leading the project, leveraging both our expertise (Collaborating).
- I will avoid expressing my interest in leading the project to prevent any tension (Avoiding).
Your roommate consistently leaves their belongings in shared spaces, causing clutter.
- I will confront my roommate about their messy habits and request they keep things tidy (Confronting).
- I will tolerate the clutter to avoid conflicts and maintain harmony (Accommodating).
- I will suggest finding a compromise, such as setting specific storage areas for each of us (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating on an organization system that suits both our needs (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing the issue and clean up after my roommate without mentioning it (Avoiding).
You and a friend have different political views and often get into heated debates.
- I will defend my views passionately and try to convince my friend of their correctness (Confronting).
- I will avoid discussing political topics with my friend to prevent arguments (Accommodating).
- I will suggest avoiding certain sensitive topics and focusing on common interests (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating on a project or activity that doesn’t involve political discussions (Collaborating).
- I will avoid spending time with my friend in settings where political discussions arise (Avoiding).
You and a colleague are both interested in the same promotion at work.
- I will compete directly with my colleague, showcasing my skills and accomplishments (Confronting).
- I will step back and let my colleague pursue the promotion without interference (Accommodating).
- I will suggest both of us applying for the promotion and let the decision-makers choose (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating with my colleague on projects to demonstrate our combined strengths (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing my interest in the promotion with my colleague to avoid tension (Avoiding).
Your family wants to visit you during a busy time at work when you prefer not to have guests.
- I will make it clear to my family that they cannot visit during that time (Confronting).
- I will accommodate their request and have them visit despite the busy time (Accommodating).
- I will suggest finding a compromise by having a shorter visit or planning for a less busy period (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating with my family to reschedule the visit to a mutually convenient time (Collaborating).
- I will avoid discussing the issue and hope my family doesn’t insist on visiting (Avoiding).
There’s a disagreement within your group of friends about where to go for a vacation.
- I will assert my choice of destination and try to convince the others it’s the best option (Confronting).
- I will follow the majority’s choice to maintain harmony within the group (Accommodating).
- I will suggest finding a compromise destination that satisfies everyone’s preferences (Compromising).
- I will propose collaborating on planning the vacation together, taking turns choosing destinations (Collaborating).
- I will avoid participating in the vacation planning discussions and go with the final decision (Avoiding).
Scoring:
After completing the assessment, review your answers and count the times you selected each conflict resolution style (Confronting, Accommodating, Compromising, Collaborating, Avoiding).
The style with the highest number of selections represents your preferred conflict resolution approach.
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Please remember that this assessment is intended for self-awareness and self-reflection purposes only.
Understanding your preferred conflict resolution style can help you navigate conflicts more effectively in various areas of your life, including personal relationships, work, and social situations.
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With 30+ years of experience, Catherine Fitzgerald, B.A., M.A., PGDip, founded Oak Innovation in 1995. Catherine received her Bachelor’s degree and Master’s from University College Cork. She holds qualifications in Professional Development And Training from University College Galway. She is completing a second Master’s from University College Cork. Since 1995, clients include Apple, Time Warner, and Harvard University.